Q   What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
A   He is mist.

Q   What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A   A sand-witch.

Q   Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
A   Anywhere where he can boo-gie.

Q   What is a vampires favorite holiday?
A   Fangsgiving

Q   What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A   You suck.

Q   What happens when two vampires meet?
A   It was love at first bite!

Q   What do goblins and ghosts drink when they're hot and thirsty on Halloween?
A   Ghoul-aid!!!

Q   Why is a ghost such a messy eater?
A   Because he is always a goblin.

Q   Who was the most famous ghost detective?
A   Sherlock Moans.

Q   What do you call two spiders that just got married?
A   Newlywebbed

Q   Why was the girl afraid of the vampire?
A   He was all bite and no bark.

Q   Who was the most famous French skeleton?
A   Napoleon bone-apart

Q   Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A   At the casketeria.

Q   What kind of makeup do ghosts wear?
A   Mas-scare-a.

Q   Why doesn't Dracula mind the doctor looking at his throat.
A   Because of the coffin.

Q   Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
A   Because demons are a ghouls best friend!

Q   What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire?
A   A toasty ghosty.

Q   Where do most goblins live?
A   In North and South Scarolina.

Q   What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon.
A   Sour-puss

Q   How do you scare a mummy
A   With a yummy dummy in a crash test crummy.

Q   Why do vampires scare people?
A   They are bored to death!

Q   What did the ghost say to the man at the coffee shop?
A   Scream or sugar!

Q   Where does a ghost refuel his Porsche?
A   At a ghastly station.

Q   Who was the most famous skeleton detective?
A   Sherlock Bones.

Q   Where did the goblin throw the football?
A   Over the ghoul line.

Q   What instrument do skeleton play?
A   Trom-BONE.

Q   What do ghosts eat for breakfast?
A   Boo-Berries.

Q   Which building does Dracula visit in New York?
A   The Vampire State Building.

Q   What is a Mummy?s favorite type of music?
A   Wrap!!!!!

Q   What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?
A   Whipped scream.

Q   What's a monster's favorite bean?
A   A human bean.

Q   What do you give a skeleton for valentine's day?
A   Bone-bones in a heart shaped box.

Q   What do you call a little monsters parents
A   Mummy and deady

Q   What do you get when you cross a vampire with the Internet?
A   Blood-thirsty hacker baby

Q   How can you tell a vampire likes baseball?
A   Every night he turns into a bat.

Q   What's it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A   A grave problem.

Q   Why did Dracula go to the dentist?
A   He had a fang-ache.

Q   What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A   It's a pain in the neck.

Q   How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
A   All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.

Q   What is a vampires least favorite food?
A   Steak

Q   Why doesn't anybody like Dracula?
A   He has a bat temper.

Q   What do witches use in their hair?
A   Scare-spray

Q   Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
A   So they can keep their ghoulish figures.

Q   Where did the ghost get it's hair done?
A   At the boo-ty shop.

Q   Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
A   Anywhere where he can boo-gie.

Q   What do they teach in witching school?
A   Spelling.

Q   Why does a witch ride a broom?
A   Vacuum cleaners get stuck at the end of the cord.

Q   Why can't the boy ghost have babies?
A   Because he has a Hallo-weenie.

Q   Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A   For the Boos.

Q   What are ghosts' favorite kind of streets?
A   Dead ends

Q   Who does Dracula get letters from?
A   His fang club.

Q   What's a monsters favorite desert?
A   I-Scream!!

Q   When does a ghost have breakfast?
A   In the moaning.

Q   What do you call a witch's garage?
A   A broom closet.

Q   Riddle: the maker does not want it, the buyer does not use it, and the user does not see it, what is it?
A   A coffin.

Q   What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
A   Spelling

Q   What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
A   Coffee with scream and sugar.

Q   Where do ghosts go out?
A   Where they can get boooooo-ze.

Q   Why did the man with a knife in his head cross the street?
A   He was dying to get to the other side!

Q   What do ghosts say when something is really neat?
A   Ghoul

Q   Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A   To go to the body shop.

Q   How does a girl vampire flirt?
A   She bats her eyes.

Q   Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
A   To stop his coffin.

Q   What can't you give the headless horseman?
A   A headache.

Q   What kind of tie does a ghost wear to a formal party?
A   A boo-tie.

Q   What's a ghosts favorite desert?
A   Boo-berry pie.

Q   Why did the game warden arrest the ghost?
A   He didn't have a haunting license.

Q   Why did the skeleton go disco dancing?
A   To see the boogy man.

Q   Why didn?t the skeleton cross the road?
A   He had no guts.

Q   What did the Mummy movie director say when the final scene was done?
A   OK, that's a wrap.

Q   How do you keep a monster from biting his nails?
A   Give him screws.

Q   Where does a ghost go on vacation?
A   Mali-boo.

Q   Why can't Boy Ghosts make babies?
A   Because they have Hollow-Weenies!

Q   What did the mother ghost say to her kids in the car?
A   Fasten your sheet belts.

Q   What do you call two witches living together?
A   Broommates.

Q   What did the corpse' mom do when her son was bad?
A   Ground him

Q   Why was the mummy so tense?
A   Because he was all wound up.

Q   Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?
A   He had no body to dance with.

Q   Why does Dracula wear patent leather shoes?
A   Sandals don't look good with his tuxedo.

Q   Why don't mummies take vacations?
A   They're afraid they'll relax and unwind.

Q   What is a ghosts favorite sale?
A   A white sale.

Q   Where do ghosts go out?
A   Where they can get sheet-faced.

Q   Why don't ghost have bands?
A   They get boooooed.

Q   Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A   Because he had bat breath.

Q   What do you call a monster who poisons corn flakes?
A   A cereal killer.

Q   Why didn't the skeleton go to see a scary movie?
A   He didn't have the guts.

Q   Who was the most famous witch detective?
A   Warlock Holmes

Q   What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a skwaush?
A   A squashed pumpkin pie.

Q   Why do ghosts shiver and moan?
A   It's drafty under that sheet.

Q   What do u get when there is a witch in the desert?
A   You get a sandwich.

Q   Why do ghosts like to ride elevators?
A   It raises their spirits.

Q   What songs does Dracula hate?
A   "You Are My Sunshine" and "Sunshine on my Shoulders.

Q   What?s a ghost's favorite type of car?
A   A boo-ick

Q   What's a skeletons favorite part of the house?
A   The living room

Q   What did the bird say on Halloween?
A   Trick or tweet!

Q   What is a vampire?s favorite fruit?
A   A necktarine

Q   Who are some of the werewolves cousins?
A   The whatwolves, the whowolves and the when wolves.

Q   Where do ghost go for fun?
A   To the boo-vies

Q   What do the skeletons say be for eating?
A   Bone appetite

Q   Why didn't the skeleton go to the Halloween party?
A   Because he had no body to go with.

Q   What did the teenage witch ask her mother on Halloween?
A   Can I have the keys to the broom tonight.

Q   How did the ghost say goodbye to the vampire?
A   So long sucker!

Q   Why can't a Skeleton Lift Weights?
A   He's all bone & no muscle.

Q   What's a Vampire's least favorite song?
A   Another one bites the dust!

Q   What is a Skeleton's favorite song.
A   Bad to the Bone

Q   What do ghosts call there girl friends?
A   There goul friends.

Q   Why are vampires like false teeth?
A   They all come out at night.

Q   What was the mummies' vacation like?
A   Nobody knows. They were too wrapped up to tell us.

Q   Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A   He wanted to get ahead in life.

Q   What kind of key does a skeleton use?
A   A skeleton key.

Q   Why do skeletons drink milk?
A   To help their bones!

Q   What did the goblin say to the witch?
A   I don't know you tell me!

Q   What did Dracula say after reading all these jokes?
A   They suck! (or they bite!)